24 Important Movies That Were DOA (And Where To Find Them)

When it comes to studio tent poles and blockbusters, it’s not necessarily better to burn out than fade.

Whenever a movie studio puts out a major movie release, there is always the hope that it could become a big hit or even spawn its own franchise.

20th century studios

However, the movie industry is a gamble, and many movies struggle to recoup their budgets, while others fade into obscurity without much of a struggle. That said, I’ve rounded up 24 notable studio releases that were dead on arrival and largely forgotten today!

1.

Max Payne

20th Century Fox Film Corp. / Courtesy Everett Collection

Mark Wahlberg stars in this toothless and nonsensical video game adaptation that replaced many of the iconic elements of the source material with…CGI valkyries???

Where to watch: HBO Max.

2.

The Seeker: The Dark Is Rising

Rights Managed / MARC PLATT PRODUCTIONS / Ronald Grant Archive / Mary Evans / Courtesy Everett Collection

The seeker hoped to be next Harry Potter-like YA franchise, but sadly lacked the magic needed to force audiences to watch this big-budget blunder.

Where to watch: Video on demand.

3.

Deliver us from evil

Screen Gems / Courtesy Everett Collection

Couldn’t even save the label “based on true events” Sinister director Scott Derrickson’s misguided and misguided (Joel McHale as a knife-fighting detective?) horror-procedural hybrid.

Where to watch: Video on demand

4.

Land of the Lost

Universal / Courtesy of Everett Collection

Will Ferrell was seemingly bombproof until his attempt to reboot Sid and Marty Krofft’s adventure property for a new generation collapsed upon release.

Where to watch: Peacock.

5.

City of Sintel

Universal / Courtesy of Everett Collection

Monster house filmmaker Gil Kenan hoped to promote Walden Media’s next big franchise, but even names like producer Tom Hanks and star Bill Murray couldn’t muster enough enthusiasm to set the box office on fire.

Where to watch: starz

6.

The losers

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

Before entering the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Idris Elba, Chris Evans and Zoe Saldana lent their respective talents to this DC comic series that couldn’t blow away enough audiences to justify future installments.

Where to watch: HBO Max

7.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

Touchstone Images / Courtesy Everett Collection

After he became famous for his role in the original version of The officeMartin Freeman was courted by Hollywood to headline this highly anticipated adaptation of the much-loved British novel, which sadly didn’t quite translate to American audiences.

Where to watch: The Roku Channel, Amazon Prime, and Hulu

8.

Spectral

Netflix / Courtesy Everett Collection

One of Netflix’s first major purchases from a rival studio, this big-budget soldier-vs-ghost war movie was forgotten almost as quickly as it arrived on the streamer.

Where to watch: Netflix

9.

The man from UNCLE

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

Henry Cavill, Armie Hammer and Alicia Vikander were Hollywood’s newest stars at the time, but their shared ambition and Guy Ritchie’s stylish directing couldn’t keep this inspired spy film afloat.

Where to watch: blowjobs

10.

white out

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

The success Kate Beckinsale found in the… underworld franchise was not replicated by this poorly marketed and critically panned snowbound thriller.

Where to watch: Video on demand

11.

ink heart

New Line Cinema / Courtesy Everett Collection

Arguably the nail in the coffin for Brandon Fraser as a leading man, New Line Cinema’s disastrous adaptation of Cornelia Funke’s 2003 novel couldn’t find the end of their storybook.

Where to watch: Video on demand

12.

sucker punch

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

Zack Snyder’s polarizing action fantasy has been called both an unsung masterpiece and a fetishistic fiasco, but one thing it can’t be called a blockbuster.

Where to watch: Netflix

13.

A wrinkle in time

Atsushi Nishijima / Walt Disney Co. / Courtesy Everett Collection

Ava DuVernay and Walt Disney Pictures assembled an all-star cast to bring Madeleine L’Engle’s formative novel to life, but the film barely had any momentum in its disappointing debut.

Where to watch: Disney+

14.

Cirque du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant

Universal / Prod.DB / Alamy

Ladies, gentlemen and children of all ages steered clear of this quirky adaptation of Darren Shen’s popular book series starring John C. Reilly.

Where to watch: Video on demand

15.

The Adventures of Tintin

Paramount Pictures / Courtesy Everett Collection

With Steven Spielberg behind the camera, Peter Jackson in the producer’s chair (and slated to direct the sequel), and a script written by Edgar Wright, Joe Cornish and Steven Moffat, international audiences embraced this world-reaching motion-capture adventure. , but the unsatisfactory domestic box office has kept Tintin from riding high again.

Where to watch: HBO Max

16.

the giver

Weinstein Company / Courtesy Everett Collection

Lois Lowry’s dystopian novel has been a staple in high school classrooms across America, but required reading doesn’t translate into must-see movie making, even if you’ve got Jeff Bridges, Meryl Streep, and Taylor Swift in your cast.

Where to watch: Netflix

17.

The A-Team

20th Century Fox Film Corp. / Courtesy Everett Collection

Joe Carnahan was tasked with bringing the modern, in-your-face A-Team into the 21st century, but a limp duck script and general indifference to the 30+ year old property left the film barely a dot on our cultural radar made .

Where to watch: hulu

18.

transcendence

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

Johnny Depp’s stardom came into question after directing this sci-fi film about AI scientists racing to complete a project that could help their dying colleague preserve his consciousness forever, and spectacularly stumbled upon the cash register.

Where to watch: hulu

19.

Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets

STX Entertainment / Courtesy Everett Collection

Luc Besson hoped Valerian would become another fifth elementlevel hit with its dazzling visual effects and fresh cast, but all its ambition eventually fell to half-full theaters.

Where to watch: Video on demand

20.

Mortal Engines

Universal Pictures / Courtesy Everett Collection

This Peter Jackson-produced sci-fi film asked the question: Will people race to see a film about traveling, predatory cities? Unfortunately the answer was “no”.

Where to watch: Peacock and Hulu

21.

Alex Cross

Summit Entertainment / Courtesy Everett Collection

This high-profile film was positioned to reintroduce James Patterson’s favorite character to a new generation, but it turns out audiences couldn’t quite accept the old Madea as a machismo-sweating action hero.

Where to watch: HBO Max

22.

The dilemma

Universal / Courtesy of Everett Collection

Believe it or not, Ron Howard’s $70 million comedy about infidelity, starring Kevin James, Vince Vaughn and Winona Ryder, left audiences as stunned in 2011 as it is now.

Where to watch: Peacock

23.

In the heart of the sea

Warner Bros / Courtesy Everett Collection

Ron Howard’s seafaring action-adventure film about a doomed whaler starring Chris Hemsworth and Tom Holland sadly sank to the bottom of the box office upon its release in 2015.

Where to watch: hulu

24.

Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time

Walt Disney Co. / Courtesy Everett Collection

In one of the biggest blunders in casting history, Jake Gyllenhaal was mistakenly recruited to star in this charmless video game adaptation that not only destroyed this potential franchise, but even served as a sign against the game series.

Where to watch: Disney+

Leave a Comment